That could be a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong blog today ;-) holy cow (isn't that just an awesome expression??? so "farmer-like" , eh? haha. Just kidding. Sounds more like something from buddism, don't they believe that cows are holy? ;-)that's cool. good times good times)
It's not like I have something to talk about. I just feel like expressing some thoughts that been in my mind for a couple of days now...Whatever. What I wanna do is basically make a big talk about NOTHING :-) lol that's me. Hey I'm in a good mood today. Maybe I should get started on my speech here now ;-) and :-) stop ;-) making :-) all these :-) smileys ;-) Juli feels crazy today. Kinda happy-sad mixed up. lil homesick. maybe not. crazy.
It's friday today. we had exams this week, I'm happy it's over. Never wrote exams before, we don't do that in Germany. So it was kinda...new. and not exciting, no. whatever. The funny (well..not really ;-) no more smileys) thing is: everybody here is sick...so sitting in the library with 100 other kids is a rather funny experience when 98 of them are sick . Coughing, sneezing, making disgusting-cold-noises all over the place- we had a good laugh cause it got pretty loud when everybody couldn't hold back anymore. yup. So I spend the afternoons at home, trying to get better and yesterday I didn't go to school at all because I felt like crap (what a wonderful english word. C-R-A-P. Universal use: crappy day, oh crap, take that crap with you, feel like crap...very cool. Oh come on, I'm just a german girl making fun of funny english words. fun fun. haha. please don't take me too serious. Thanx.) I hate being sick and I hate staying at home all day. Because you have too much time to THINK. THINK about stuff you usually don't THINK about. not cool. Maybe it's just me, but too much THINKING drives me crazy. So I was actually happy to go back to school today.
And you know what? It was a nice day at school! All the girls got a heart attack when they saw I cut off my hair (I told you ;-) but they all said they like it. Gotta admit- made me feel pretty good ;-) I'm getting used to this short hair of mine . And I don't even regret cutting it off (yet) !!! Oh yeah. Even some guys noticed that my hair is about 10000000 feet shorter. That's special, eh? Guys NEVER notice stuff like that ;-) Haha I'm just kidding. StiIl like you guys. couldn't really care less about how other people think about me. But it was still a nice day. you know what I mean ;-) yeah well.
Maybe it's time to talk about some deeper, more meaningful stuff. The last couple of days I've been realizing it's about halftime here. Halftime of my stay in Canada. Just 5 months left and I'll be back in good ol' germany. weird. It's weird how you miss certain things. some food stuff (like real German bread). the mountains. my home-city. and of course people. Friends, Family...
even more confusing is how much I'll miss everything once I'm gone away from Canada. It'll be worse I think. Because I know I'll be back in Germany pretty soon, I can prepare and stuff. If I get homesick, I know I'll be back. But when I'm back in Germany...I'll get homesick for Canada. I just know it. And that makes me feel sad already. Isn't that just so "JULI" and stupid? worry too much...
I've been writing a bit more emails with my best friend Mira lately. She's in San Francisco as an exchange student right now. we've been great friends since grade 5. I always feel like without her, I'm not the Juli I usually am. She wrote in one of her last emails:" I actually don't know how I made it through all that here without my best friend. "
You know how sometimes one little sentence can make you cry and laugh and get that warm feeling inside at the same time??? I wish I could give her a hug right now. *hug* (just in case she read it). ;-) Mira's christmas present for me arrived today ;-) yup it's a lil late but i don't think mine got there yet ;-) Yeah.
She sent me 5 CDs (pretty cool songs!!! Oh Yeah!!) and a keyring (a little wooden surfboard ;-) and a big letter. It's definitely one of the best letters I ever got. Lots of stuff she writes about sounds like I could have written it ;-) we just think about the same stuff. Cause we're both kind of in the same situation...Yeah well, so that letter really made me feel good. Cause I know she still thinks about me. Cooooooool.
There's lots in my mind I can't figure out- about all that Germany-Canada-two worlds-which one do I wanna live in- miss friends-how will I ever get back to "normal" in Germany- aaah I'm so confused-thing. But right now I feel that strong connection I have with some of my friends. And that's gonna get me through all that (I think you call that "life") I'm sure.
Thank you God for Angels on earth
good night
JULI
thank you Mira
Saturday, February 05, 2005
Friday, February 04, 2005
I lost at least 10 pounds today ;-) just kidding
I got a haircut.
that may not sound special to you if you don't know me. but: Juli never gets her hair cut. because that involves a lot: thinking bout what I actually want to change with my hair - figure out where to get the haircut- figure out if I have enough money to get one ;-) - make an appointment- still try to figure out what I want - forget the appointment and have to make a new one - finally going there, still not knowing what I want - telling the person who wants to cut my hair that I don't know what I want (the "make it look good" thing...) - spending an hour (or half an hour ;-) sitting in that chair, with that crazy thing around me so the hair don't get in my cloth (I actually think they do that because of another reason: you cant move your arms and hands. so when the guy cutting does something you don't want you can't just stop him by grabbing the scissors... ;-) smart) - finally getting the haircut - realizing that it looks way shorter than I thought it would- paying - leaving - getting right into a "is that still me? " crisis and maybe realizing that I can't change it any way.
yup that's the way it always is. I didn't cut my hair for almost 2 years. they were really really long now. almost touched my pants ;-) so it was a big thing for me today. because now they're hardly hanging over my shoulders. Oh Lord give me strength ;-) haha. well actually it doesn't look to bad. but I'll still get my "I want my hair back- that's not me" crisis, I'm sure. and a bunch of other people will get heart attacks at school tomorrow..."why did you do that????"
haha good times. ITS JUST A HAIRCUT. THEY WILL GROW AGAIN
that was just to make myself feel better. I feel so free. can turn my head where I want it to without dragging 10 punds behind me ;-) haha
Ok, that wasn't the most thoughtful post ever, I do realize that. maybe tomorrow. cause I got a bit of stuff to write about. so stay tuned haha
good night everybody. I feel weird
love JULI
did I mention that I cut my hair today??? sorry
I'll put a "before'n after " picture on the internet tomorrow..what do you think?? ;-)
that may not sound special to you if you don't know me. but: Juli never gets her hair cut. because that involves a lot: thinking bout what I actually want to change with my hair - figure out where to get the haircut- figure out if I have enough money to get one ;-) - make an appointment- still try to figure out what I want - forget the appointment and have to make a new one - finally going there, still not knowing what I want - telling the person who wants to cut my hair that I don't know what I want (the "make it look good" thing...) - spending an hour (or half an hour ;-) sitting in that chair, with that crazy thing around me so the hair don't get in my cloth (I actually think they do that because of another reason: you cant move your arms and hands. so when the guy cutting does something you don't want you can't just stop him by grabbing the scissors... ;-) smart) - finally getting the haircut - realizing that it looks way shorter than I thought it would- paying - leaving - getting right into a "is that still me? " crisis and maybe realizing that I can't change it any way.
yup that's the way it always is. I didn't cut my hair for almost 2 years. they were really really long now. almost touched my pants ;-) so it was a big thing for me today. because now they're hardly hanging over my shoulders. Oh Lord give me strength ;-) haha. well actually it doesn't look to bad. but I'll still get my "I want my hair back- that's not me" crisis, I'm sure. and a bunch of other people will get heart attacks at school tomorrow..."why did you do that????"
haha good times. ITS JUST A HAIRCUT. THEY WILL GROW AGAIN
that was just to make myself feel better. I feel so free. can turn my head where I want it to without dragging 10 punds behind me ;-) haha
Ok, that wasn't the most thoughtful post ever, I do realize that. maybe tomorrow. cause I got a bit of stuff to write about. so stay tuned haha
good night everybody. I feel weird
love JULI
did I mention that I cut my hair today??? sorry
I'll put a "before'n after " picture on the internet tomorrow..what do you think?? ;-)
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